The Good and Evil Project

Why wait to accomplish something you’ve dreamt of, something you’ve longed for, all because someone in your life told you not to? What’s stopping you? You stay up late at night wracking your brain, strategizing, analyzing, until your mind is set. “I’m going to do this,” you say, “I want to do this.” Then you wake up later, and feel the need to tell everyone what you’re going to do. You don’t just do it. You tell everyone. Everyone you possibly can. They all have their opinions. 

“Well,” they say, “if I were you, I’d do this instead.” 

They also say, “Why do it like that? Do it this way.” 

They continue to say, “Did you even think about what you’re about to do?” 

And they don’t know how long you thought on it. They weren’t there when you cried in bed, alone, asking yourself what you want. What you need. They didn’t see you pace around the house because the anxiousness of it all refused to allow you to sit on it. They’ll never see what you go through. Why wait to accomplish something you’ve dreamt of, something you’ve longed for, all because someone in your life told you not to? What’s stopping you? Yourself. 

Validation is the most addictive drug in human existence. When we hear others around us praise our choices and actions, we rejoice. We feel good about what we did or what we’re about to do. Our accomplishments then shift from doing something for ourselves, to doing something for others. We don’t say, “Hey, I’m doing this. Stand with it or go.” We ask, “I’m thinking about doing this, but I wanted to see how you felt about it?” Some might call it getting a second opinion. Others might call it gaining perspective. But the truth is that we hide behind the cowardice of reassurance and call it validation. 

Whether you believe it or not, the time you take to yourself, you’re not having a conversation alone. You’re not asking yourself questions. You’re not making your own plan. You’re talking to God. You’re asking Jesus to be your Shepherd. You’re unraveling the plan God has made for you, with Him. It’s called praying. “I hope this happens to me!” That’s a prayer. “I want to do all of these things, say what I mean, feel what I want to feel!” That’s a prayer for courage. “Why does this hurt me so much?” That’s a prayer for comfort. 

The more we ask our neighbors what we should do, the less time we’re taking to bring those questionable things to God. Because when we take things to God, it’s not for validation, it’s for clarity. And in the sickness of the evil that’s saturated the world around us, clarity is too easy. Innately, we love to struggle. Struggle brings us together. Struggle allows us to relate to our neighbor who we never knew was going through the same thing, or went through it before we started down our own path. If you’re hurting, you want people to know about it, because you seek the validity from others when they tell you, “It’ll be alright. I’m here for you.” But we cower at the thought of allowing Jesus to tell us the same. 

In the strangeness of Free Will, our greatest ally and our strongest battle, we ask ourselves that if we don’t receive the instant gratification that our neighbors can give us, then what’s the point? What are we doing all of this for? You could do it all for God. You can give the glory to Him. You can bring Him your struggles. But you won’t. Because your guilt, your fears, your struggles say that you aren’t worthy of the Light God will bring to you. And that Light is clarity. Think about it. We turn on the light switch in a dark room to get the clarity that nothing’s lurking in the shadows. What’s stopping you from allowing God to do that for you? Yourself. 

How many times has someone told you to do something and you hated the result in the end? It’s not simply because you turned from a decision for yourself, it’s because you strayed from God’s path. It’s because you took advice from the same people who will never confess their own sins. It’s because you took guidance and sought shelter in those around you that find solace in hypocrisy. And did you ever notice those same people never adhere to your advice? Even when they ask for it. It’s because they stand on the side of victory rather than humility. “I’ve struggled more than you,” they’ll say, “I know what to do!” No they don’t. And that scares them. And they take that fear out on you. They make you feel small. They make you feel like your voice is worth nothing more than a whisper. 

But, when you take your uncertainties to God, He doesn’t tell you what to do because you’re incapable of making your own decisions. You make choices every moment of everyday. He doesn’t give you guidance because you’re  incapable of making your decisions. He knows you can. And He wants you to choose. But, He also wants to remind you that no matter what decision you make, even when He gives you all the answers and you might turn the other way, that you’re supposed to turn to Him when you’ve hit that dead end. You’re supposed to cry to Him. You’re supposed to ask Him what to do. Because He created you with a specific intention. 

And you won’t find that destined intention from your neighbor. They didn’t create you. Your mother may have given birth to you, sure, but you were God’s gift to your mother. The reason your mother carried you is because of His design. Because she prayed for your existence. You find yourself at dead ends because you’re not running towards the One Person who knows all the answers. You’re running towards validation from those who can’t even validate themselves. 

Validity is not clarity. Validity is a false promise.